An Unfortunate Change of Direction
by animalwriter
Summary: Herpetologist Lydia Haslett realizes that her favorite book series is actually TRUE and finds herself suddenly involved in a huge conspiracy of a secret organization along with her guide, the odd, and yet somehow attractive, Lemony Snicket.
1. The Assignment

"I knew it! _I knew it_! I _knew _that Beatrice was their mother!" Lydia Haslett closed the book in her lap triumphantly with a short nod to nobody in particular, as nobody else was there; "I've been absolutely convinced of it ever since Book Seven, when Esme made that claim about Beatrice to the children! _Now _people are definitely going to believe me!" she stood from her couch and placed the hardcover book with the strangely thick, uneven pages on the end table next to where she had been sitting, then strode confidently into the kitchen of her small single apartment with a secret smile on her face that she longed to share with somebody, if only to gloat at them about it.

As she took her skillet and the ingredients for fried rice out of her cupboard, then began to heat the olive oil on the stove so that she could crack her egg in, she contemplated again on the book she had just finished reading. The end of _A Series of Unfortunate Events_, aptly titled "The End". Her mood changed from smug to thoughtful as she considered all the Unfortunate Events that had led up to the books' conclusion. It wasn't an ecstatically happy ending, of course. Much more bittersweet… but under the circumstances, that was the best for which she could hope, to quote Lemony Snicket, the strangest author she had ever read.

Of course, obviously there was a _real _author somewhere. Lemony Snicket was just a character, of course. Although it was strange that no matter how hard she tried to figure it out, there was no information anywhere about who the real author of the story was. She suspected that it might be that man who was supposedly Lemony Snicket's representative, Daniel Handler. But she had no proof of that. Well, whoever the author was, he or she definitely knew how to keep themselves out of the spotlight. That had to be awfully hard to do in today's society.

Lydia was just adding the rice to her skillet concoction when her long-haired, Maine Coon tortoiseshell-tabby cat Allie walked slowly into the room, yawning after having just woken up from her afternoon nap.

Lydia turned and smiled at her cat, "I am triumphant, Allie! I made yet another correct guess on the outcome while reading stories! Face it; you're living with a genius!"

She could never be certain exactly what the cat's feelings were about her comment. Allie simply sat down in the middle of the kitchen floor and looked up at Lydia, her curious expression meeting her owner's smug one. But of course, there was no use in dwelling on the stories of A Series of Unfortunate Events for too long. There were other series to read, other things to get involved in. And her job…

She glanced at the clock on the wall. She had just enough time to finish making her rice and eat it before she had to get to the lab. And, as usual, by the time she was finished eating she was rushing to grab her things just so that she could make it there on time.

"Sorry if I confused you, Allie," Lydia said before placing a letter she had to mail on the way into her mouth while she fished for her purse and briefcase in the pile of mess on the floor next to the end table, "Btt, I… hd to cm in late," she placed the letter into her purse and headed toward the door, careful that the cat didn't follow her out, "I have to go in late to work today, that's why I was here all morning… sorry, but I can't stay, but I'll be back later tonight, okay? Be a good girl, bye-bye!" and she had closed the door behind her and was rushing off to her car in order to mail the letter, and then get to work on time. This was her life. The same thing every day, but it was a satisfying life nonetheless. And yet, somehow she couldn't help the feeling that some kind of big change was just right around the corner…

Well, she made it on time of course.

Lydia was smug again as she marched into the shiny new building on the Michigan Underground University campus where her lab was located on the fifth floor. It was more of an office building than a lab, really. Or at least that's what it looked like. But at any rate, no matter how rushed she was she always arrived just on time to work and nobody was ever suspicious and she never got in trouble.

"I'm an expert at everything, if I do say so myself," she said softly to herself, her triumphant mood from earlier that afternoon still sticking with her as she headed into the elevator and pushed the button to floor 5.

She slapped on her, 'Lydia Haslett: Herpetology Lab Technician: MUU' nametag as she pushed open the door into her boss's office, Jim Smith, Professor and Chair of the Herpetology Department.

"Ah, Lydia!" he put down the papers he was looking at and smiled at her, "Good afternoon, sit down," she sat in the chair across from his desk as he continued, "I suppose you're wondering why I had you come in late today."

"Well, just a little bit," she confessed, slipping her purse and briefcase onto the floor next to her.

"I needed to meet with some colleagues…" he hesitated, "Have you finished reading your book?"

"Um…" his question took her aback for a moment, "Well, yes but what does that have to do with anything?"

"Nothing," he hurriedly replied, "It's just that you were getting a bit distracted by that series for the last few days, and I want to make sure you're ready to focus again."

His reasoning was a little strange. Sure, she had been pretty into the book, but she was certain that her performance at work hadn't suffered for it… or well, at least not as much as he seemed to be implying. But she could sense something important coming, so it was best to just accept anything he said right now and stay on his good side. Not that he got angry very often, but she'd seen it on occasion, "Don't worry, I promise to be especially focused on whatever you want me to do."

"Good, because I was discussing a new assignment for you this morning, but I didn't want you to get any word of it until it was official."

"A new assignment?" if she was an animal her ears would have perked up at this. Now he definitely had her attention.

"Well, you just finished the Invasive Cane Toads project, and I was very pleased with your work," he paused and then added, almost as if he felt forced to do so, "Despite your slight distraction toward the end of it. At any rate, however, I think you're ready for a more important project this time around. It would require some travel time however. Are you all right with that?"

"That's fine," she agreed, anxious to hear what this project would be all about.

"All right, then I'll give you the details. I would like you to go to the rainforests of Florida, where a new species of snake has just been discovered."

"Ooh, really!?" now she was definitely intrigued as she leaned forward in her seat so as to hear better.

"Yes," he smiled slightly, "This species of snake is unlike any we've ever studied before in the herpetological world. Its behavior is more wormlike than anything else. That's why it has been named the "Brown Wormviper."

"The Brown Wormviper," she repeated to herself, "But why has it only just been discovered?"

"It seems they live underground and only emerge once every seventeen years or so, something like the behavior of the periodical cicada."

"Then why didn't you call it the "Brown Cicadaviper?" she grinned at her joke.

Jim laughed, "Well, I didn't name it. Regardless, this challenges many of our long-held notions about snake biology and behavior."

"And you want _me _to take on this project?" she was feeling more and more flattered at his decision every moment.

"Well, you'll be working with a group," he was quick to temper her excitement, "But yes, I feel that you are the best choice we have here."


	2. Suspicious Requests

"Thank you!" Lydia felt like her eyes must be as big as saucers, and perhaps her mouth was hanging open, but this promotion was so much more than she ever would have expected.

"I'm sure you will serve us well," Jim said with a slight smile, "But you had better go home early today."

"Um," she was taken aback once again, "Go home early? But why?"

"To pack," his response was curter than with what she was usually familiar, "You leave tomorrow morning."

"Tomorrow morning? But – but this is such short notice!" Lydia jumped up from her seat, "What if I had refused the project?"

"Would you have?"

"Well… no, but-"

"Listen, I understand that it is short notice," Jim frowned, "But I was certain that you would take the position. It of course entails a pay raise as well. But this research must be undertaken quickly. If we can't complete it before the snakes return underground we'll have to wait another seventeen years to do more."

"Even if they're underground, if we know they're there, can't we monitor their movements and behavior with radar or something?"

"They apparently come above ground to breed. We want to understand about that, as well as their behavior underground. I'm surprised you didn't consider that."

"Well I am in a bit of a shock. How long is this appointment for?"

"As long as it takes. We don't know much about the life cycle yet, or how long they stay above ground."

She sighed, digesting this, "You really want me to leave tomorrow?"

"It's absolutely necessary that you leave tomorrow. Your team is expecting you."

"But what about my cat? My friends and family? This barely gives me enough time to arrange for care for her and to inform all of the people I know about-"

"Arrangements have already been made."

That made her frown; "They have been?"

"Yes. You gave us emergency contact information when you signed on to work here, didn't you? Since I knew you would take on this project I happily contacted those people, told them about what was happening, and all arrangements have been made. You need simply to give us the key to your place before you leave and your friend contact will pick up your cat late tomorrow evening. Your family has been instructed to inform all of your other friends and relations where you are. There is nothing further that you need to do."

Now, _that _was presumptuous. Yes, she knew the nature of the university was a little more open and she _had _signed a form waiving certain privacy rights due to the fact that the university was government-established, but this seemed a bit much. Still, she didn't want to ruin her chances at taking on this project, and so didn't see fit to complain. And her apartment _was _leased through the university, effectively making Jim her landlord and perfectly within legal rights to request her key from her.

She had known that certain things might be awkward if she took this job, and she had accepted that due to the prestigious nature of the work she would be doing. Still, she had begun to think none of that was going to happen, because up until this point nobody had requested any private information from her. The warnings and the waiver had seemed like exaggerations... until now.

"Well, thank you I suppose," she said awkwardly. "That makes it... a little easier on my end, I guess."

"I thought so. We are happy to provide such conveniences to our best employees," Jim shot her a smile, flattering her and almost making her forget about how weird this all was until he said his next piece; "I am afraid you shall have to surrender your phone to us as well."

"What? My phone?"

"Oh, please don't worry. You will be provided with a business phone to replace it. All of your necessary contacts will be programmed into it. You see, this is a highly sensitive project. If our competitors from any of the other states get in on this first, well... we could lose all funding. You know how the king is. He only funds government agencies while they do not disappoint him. The Queen of Florida is already suspicious of our work in her state; her research team is a great threat to ours. And the King of Arizona is putting together a research team of his own as well. You will need to cut off all contact with unapproved individuals at least until we get a paper published. You understand this, don't you?"

She sighed and nodded; "I suppose so." The Invasive Cane Toads project had been conducted fairly under wraps as well, but nowhere near so much so as this one apparently had to be. Granted, this was a new species and a dramatic one as well. Given the circumstances, maybe everything wasn't quite so strange after all.

"Wonderful!" Jim's pleasure was evident in his eyes; "Then you leave tomorrow!"


	3. On Her Way

**A/N: Thank you for the reviews, although some of them were sent a long time ago. Thanks also to Fanatic Fan for the more recent review. I hope readers are still enjoying this story, and I'm sorry it's been so slow to update. I intend to start rereading the series and work on updating this a lot faster and finishing it as well. Thanks for your interest! :)**

* * *

Lydia sighed and wiped the sweat from her brow, having finally finished packing all of her things on this hot day in her not-so-well-air-conditioned apartment. She was due to arrive at the airport in a little over an hour and then she would be off to Florida on a private charter from the University.

She stared down at the business phone in her hands. It was the latest technology and rather huge in comparison to her ordinary phone, and all of her work contacts had been programmed into it. But _only _her work contacts.

That made her uneasy. That and the fact that she had absolutely no way of contacting any of her family or friends. She would have thought – or hoped – they would allow her to visit first or to say good-bye or… something, but no. Supposedly they all knew where she was and one of her friends would come and pick up her cat. Jim had assured her that her friends and family wished her well and understood perfectly the fact that she couldn't talk to them at all until this project was finished, but it wasn't the same as seeing and hearing that for herself.

But what could she do? It was either accept all this secrecy or don't do the project, and she _really _wanted to be involved in this project. Maybe things would be easier when she got united with her team. Maybe the project wouldn't last long and she could be reunited with her friends, family, and cat within the month. Maybe this would pass by perfectly fine.

Pushing aside the little warning voice in her head, she leaned over and picked Allie up, cuddling her fluffy pet in her arms; "Somebody's going to come and pick you up and take very good care of you for awhile, okay, baby?" she murmured into the cat's soft fur. "I wish I could take you with me but I just can't. But I will be back as _soon _as possible." She whined a little and hugged her cat tighter, fighting back tears, "I'm gonna miss you, Allie." Sighing, she kissed the top of the cat's head and released her, placing her carefully on the ground.

Dragging her suitcases behind her, Lydia headed to the door, opening it and rolling them outside before tossing her phone in her purse, which sat on the little end table next to the door, and looping her arm through the handle. Then she turned off the lights, pet her cat a couple more times, and reluctantly closed the door.

There was no going back now.

* * *

Jim met her at the airport, looking as enthusiastic as ever as he pointed at the small plane that towered above them. "There she is! Your pilot is already in there and ready to transport you to the team's meeting place in Florida City, Florida, just north of the rainforests. The flight will be about two hours. All there is left to do is hop on."

Lydia considered the plane. It was large and colored white and orange, and all of the windows lining the sides were closed. The writing on the side identified the plane as belonging to Michigan Underground University, approved by the King of Michigan for research use. Again, something struck her funny, but she ignored it.

She heaved her suitcases up the stairs leading into the plane as Jim followed behind her. Stopping inside, she turned to the right, intent on thanking the pilot for flying her, but was surprised to see a steel door separating the passenger area from the controls of the plane. She turned to Jim, "Is there anyone else on this plane? A steward or stewardess or something?"

"Nope," he shook his head as though this were completely normal, "Just you, Lydia. You and the pilot."

"No co-pilot?"

"No, just you and the pilot," he insisted, now seeming a bit agitated.

"Can I talk to the pilot?"

"No. He's not a very social person. Just take a seat and relax. The flight will not be long and I promise you will be met as soon as you get off by plenty of friendly people you can socialize with."

"Well… all right…" she stuffed her suitcase into an overhead compartment that had been labeled with her name on it and settled into the seat underneath, reaching for the lower part of the sash to roll up her window and let some natural light in.

"No," Jim said suddenly, putting a hand on her arm to stop her. "I'm afraid our project's top secret nature expressly forbids you from opening any windows."

"You're kidding."

"I informed you of the nature of our project. You should have expected this."

"Who expects this much secrecy?" she demanded. "Does it really matter who is inside the plane if our University's logo is plastered all over the side? It doesn't make any sense!" She finally let herself get a little bolder as she protested these weird occurrences. After all, how could she sit back when her boss had just told her to sit alone in a tiny, windowless airplane for two hours with only one pilot that she couldn't even talk to or so much as _look _at. It was creepy.

"You have to trust us. Unless you don't want to be involved in the project?" he raised a questioning eyebrow.

She sighed and pursed her lips, considering that. It was back to the project again. She _really _didn't want to reject this opportunity and she suspected that Jim knew that. But she had to at least double check all of these details one more time. "Are you sure this is going to be a safe plane ride?" she demanded, raising an eyebrow right back at him. "One pilot? No one to take over if he's incapacitated but me and no way for me to get up there to the controls to do so? And even if there was I know _nothing _about flying a plane."

"Trust me, you'll be safe," her boss gave her and oddly reassuring smile. She'd always liked Jim, but today he was acting very strange. "There is _no way _that the pilot will be incapacitated. If you're that nervous I suggest you take a tranquilizer. They have been provided for you free of charge and placed in the seat back pocket in front of you. Before you know it you will be safe on the ground in Florida City."

Lydia wanted to argue more, but she sensed it would be futile, and she _really _wanted this assignment. "All right," she finally agreed, before Jim bid her a hasty farewell.

Next thing she knew the door had closed and she was stuck in this isolated little plane, with only the dim orange lights from the ceiling shining down on her and the noise of the vehicle's engine to keep her company. Swallowing back her nervousness, she reached into the seat back pocket and pulled out the bottle of tranquilizers Jim had mentioned, reading the fine print for dosage and instructions. She had never heard of tranquilizers being offered to passengers free of charge before.

Ultimately, she decided against using them. She would try to keep this as normal as possible. Pretend nothing weird was going on.

That was easier said than done, though. It was quite unnerving taking off without being able to look out the window and see it happen. She had _always _been a window seat person on planes. It made her more comfortable when she had a view to distract her from things like other passenger's and turbulence. Now that was not the case. She felt every single air pocket the plane encountered with a jolt and a nervous gulp, but she still refused to take the tranquilizers. Instead, she pulled "The Bad Beginning" out of her carry-on bag and opened it up. _A Series of Unfortunate Events_, though she had only just finished reading the last book, was an easy, fun read and hopefully a good distraction for her on this horrible flight.

Now that she unequivocally _knew _that Beatrice was the Baudelaire's mother, the little dedication at the beginning of the book struck her differently. It would be fun to read the series again from the beginning with that certain knowledge, looking for more clues, interpreting things from that vantage point.

She chuckled as she read. Lemony Snicket, or whoever he really was, was such an interesting author. With his whole 'which here means' word definitions and his baby-talk translations and his sort of… proper, fancy way of talking and his adorably romantic devotion to Beatrice, though she was dead and had married somebody else anyway and it was really sort of sad.

All in all, though, she almost wished that these stories were real. She was sure the author would be an interesting person to meet. But they just _couldn't _be real. The whole thing about it being a true story was just a part of the fiction and she knew that. After all, the world wasn't that terrible, there weren't all these ridiculous conspiracies and secret organizations floating around. Everything was nice and innocent.

Then again, if that was the case, she thought with a frown, what was she doing on this creepy plane with no windows and no access to the pilot and a phone she couldn't use to contact her family and a bunch of tranquilizers in the seat back pocket that Jim had seemed oddly desirous that she take?

Pushing those silly thoughts aside, she settled back in her chair and continued reading.


End file.
